Normally, when a white woman gets racially profiled, she is accidentally handed a pumpkin spice latte at Starbucks. However, not for Tan Mom. She was apprehended by ICE Agents because her complexion resembles the dark side of the moon, in both shade and texture. That was until Trump’s Gestapo realized she was just a MAGA-Karen in blackface, and immediately released her wannabe black ass back into the wild…. After securing the selfie, of course.
Today’s Palate Cleanser is brought to you by Sports Gambling: The reason your nephew and Eliot from Jordan’s Furniture were both contemplating selling their blood this week. Yes, that’s right, the local New England furniture store, Jordan’s Furniture, was also sweating out their March Madness bets this past weekend. Because if both UConn’s Men’s and Women’s basketball teams had advanced to the NCAA Basketball Championship Game, all of their customers’ purchases over a certain period would have been fully refunded. And if you’re thinking, “Wow, that was way too close! I bet they never do that again!” Wrong….WRONG!!! They’ve been pulling this shit for years… and losing! In fact, the Boston Red Sox have furnished more homes over the years than “The Price Is Right” and “Extreme Home Makeover” combined. It got so bad that Jordan’s went from first offering free furniture, “…if the Red Sox won the World Series,” to “…if the Red Sox swept the World Series.” Which didn’t matter in 2007, because the Sox were so good that year that the only reason the Colorado Rockies even showed up to Fenway was to pick up their free furniture.
Final Four
UConn Men
UConn Women
